


maybe in another lifetime

by stupidbadgers



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Implied Shiranui Genma/Namiashi Raidou - Freeform, M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love, it ends soft, no friendships are lost over the course of this story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-15 00:48:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29055402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupidbadgers/pseuds/stupidbadgers
Summary: genma never thought he would be the "fall in love with your best friend" type, but here he was. too bad his best friend is in love with someone else.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka, Namiashi Raidou & Shiranui Genma, Shiranui Genma & Umino Iruka
Comments: 6
Kudos: 67





	maybe in another lifetime

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seekingsquake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekingsquake/gifts), [jessicamiriamdrew](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessicamiriamdrew/gifts).



> i wholeheartedly blame my obsession with _evermore_ on mir and jayde. also my blooming love of iru/gen. this is for you both. 
> 
> i love genma and i'm sorry i hurt him. 
> 
> enjoy~

Genma, of all people, had never thought he would be the “fall in love with your best friend” type, but here he was, daydreaming about the perfect life with Iruka. There was something about the sensei that called to Genma. 

He wasn’t quite sure how they had become so close or even when, but one day he realized that he and Iruka were just as close as he and Raidou and that realization didn’t bother him one bit. It always made his day brighter when he got to see Iruka, usually manning the Mission Desk or when Iruka would deliver reports to the Hokage. It didn’t matter, as long as Genma was graced with one of those big smiles that were never in short supply with the chuunin. 

It was one night over drinks with Iruka, the exhaustion of a long, brutal mission settling into Genma’s bones, that he realized how deep his feelings for the other man had gone. It was in his exhausted state that he decided there was no time like the present and made his move. 

Genma had grabbed Iruka’s hand when they left the bar, declaring that Iruka walk him home. Iruka had laughed, the sound the sweetest song Genma had ever heard. 

It was once they were inside Genma’s flat that he had to gather his courage. He pulled his senbon from his mouth, tucking it into his flak vest before tossing the vest over a chair. 

Iruka was standing in the entryway still, waiting for Genma to say something. He had a way of knowing when something was on Genma’s mind. 

The tokubetsu took a deep breath before turning back around to look at Iruka head on, walking until he was standing close enough to the other man that he had to tilt his head up just slightly to look him in the eye. 

“You can punch me after if you feel it’s necessary,” Genma said in a rush before grabbing Iruka’s face with both hands and kissing him. 

Iruka squeaked, hands flailing in surprise. Then he started kissing Genma back and Genma was sure he was dreaming or dead. Either seemed more plausible than the reality of Iruka kissing him back. And, damn, could Iruka kiss. 

The chuunin tilted his head and it felt like sparks were igniting along Genma’s spine. 

When they finally broke apart, both men were panting hard. Surprise was still on Iruka’s face, his dark eyes wide. 

“How long have you been wanting to do that?” Iruka asked. 

“Too long.” 

Iruka bit his lip, his eyes casting down, “Genma…” 

Genma knew that tone; it was the one that was going to break his heart into a thousand pieces.

He plastered a smile onto his face, trying for his normal air of cockiness, “Well, I had to try, right? Can’t even tempt you for one night?” 

Iruka laughed, but the sound was a pale imitation of what it had been earlier that evening. 

“I respect you too much for that, Gen,” he said. Iruka reached for Genma’s hand, squeezing it briefly. “I hope… I hope this doesn’t change our friendship. You’re my best friend and I really don’t want to lose you.” 

“It’s fine, Ru; we’re fine. I promise,” Genma said. He wrinkled his nose a little, huffing a self-deprecating laugh. “I should have known though.” 

The words weren’t filled with malice—they were closer to resignation. 

Iruka’s eyebrows furrowed, “What do you mean?” 

Genma looked Iruka straight in the eye, a knowing smirk, that hint of the mischievous gossip that he was shining through just a little. “You have the hots for Hatake.” 

The other man spluttered, his face turning a shade of red that Genma had never seen before. 

“I—what—I wouldn’t—He’s—”

Genma raised an eyebrow. 

“That man is the most infuriating jounin in the world. He’s lazy and perpetually late, his mission reports are a mess, all he does is poke fun at me to get me to yell at him.”

“Uh huh, that’s how he flirts with you.” 

Iruka stopped his spluttering, his mouth gaping. “ _That’s_ his flirting? Are you saying he _likes_ me?” 

Genma couldn’t stop the pang that shot through his heart at the hopeful tone. 

“Iruka, I’m pretty sure half the village is in love with you,” 

He hadn’t meant to sound so dejected, but the words were out and couldn’t be taken back now. 

“I’m sorry,” Iruka whispered. Genma saw the tears gather in the corners of Iruka’s eyes. 

Genma cupped Iruka’s cheek, brushing the tears away with his thumb. “Hey, you have nothing to be sorry for. It’s life. This doesn’t change anything between us though.” 

He pulled Iruka in for a hug, holding tight to his best friend, his heart in pieces with the knowledge that was all they would ever be. 

*

It had been six months since that night and Genma was still nursing his broken heart. He should have known getting over Iruka would be impossible when there had been no distance between them since then. 

Well, that wasn’t quite true. 

There had been distance, but that distance had come in the form of one Hatake Kakashi. A month after Iruka had so kindly rejected Genma, the chuunin and Kakashi had started dating. Genma was happy for Iruka, yes, but it also ripped at him, tearing him apart on the inside. 

He did his best to hide that from Iruka though, making excuses here or there to skip hanging out with his friend. Iruka never cancelled their plans to spend time with Kakashi though, and Genma didn’t know if that made him feel better or worse. 

Kakashi was obviously aware of how close Iruka and Genma were, that their friendship ran deep, but Genma was never quite sure if Kakashi knew how Genma felt. There was only one person other than Iruka that knew about his feelings and that was Raidou, though that only happened because the day after Genma had kissed Iruka, Genma had landed on Raidou’s doorstep with two six packs of beer and one of the Hokage’s bottles of sake. He had proceeded to get extremely shitfaced drunk and, before passing out in Rai’s lap—he still doesn’t remember how he had ended up there—had told Raidou everything. 

If Genma had to guess though, he would say that Kakashi knew, based on the piercing gaze he would feel at times, especially while in proximity to Iruka. It wasn’t malicious, just assessing. 

For Kakashi’s part, he didn’t seem at all threatened by Genma—and really, that was no surprise to the tokubetsu. Who would choose anyone over Hatake Kakashi, the snide part of Genma considered. Putting aside the bitterness he felt toward Kakashi because of Iruka though, he actually considered Hatake a friend and if it wasn’t for the fact of Genma’s inconvenient feelings for Iruka, he wouldn’t have had a problem with Kakashi at all. 

It was because he was friends with both Kakashi and Iruka, as well as everyone else at their large table, that he was in the bar tonight. He hadn’t quite been feeling up for going out, but Iruka had employed the puppy dog eyes and Raidou had gently nudged him to go. 

Genma did his best not to stare at Iruka and Kakashi. The jounin was in the middle of a story about something Genma wasn’t paying attention to. The two were pressed together in the booth, Kakashi’s arm around Iruka, his hand on Iruka’s waist, the position possessive. 

Iruka’s laughter pulled Genma from his darkening thoughts. The chuunin had his beer bottle almost to his lips, hovering in midair while he listened to Kakashi talk. His eyes—which hadn’t left Kakashi most of the night—had a light to them that Genma had only seen when Iruka was looking at the jounin and Naruto, something he could only describe as love and affection. His heart twisted at the sight and he tried not to glare at Kakashi. 

He excused himself quietly, hoping no one would notice his departure from the table. Genma slipped outside the bar, walking to the end of the building before sitting on the ground with his knees up and forearms resting on them. 

It was only a moment before another presence settled next to him. 

“I’m sorry,” Genma said quietly. 

Iruka squeezed Genma’s bicep, leaning his head on the tokubetsu’s shoulder. 

Genma continued, “I really am happy you’re happy, I swear. It’s just… sometimes I see how happy you are and I wonder why it couldn’t be us. Why you couldn’t be that happy with me.” 

“For what it’s worth, I wish it could have been. Maybe it was meant to be in another lifetime and the wires got crossed in this one.” 

Genma laughed softly, “Only you would say that.” 

“Hey!” Iruka pouted, nudging Genma’s ribs with his elbow. “I’m serious. I can see it, just… not here, not now.” He went quiet for a moment, like he was trying to decide whether he should continue. 

“What?” Genma prompted. 

“I love you, Gen, and I wish it could have been, but I’m _in love_ with Kakashi. And I don’t want to see you hurting all the time. Sometimes you look at him like you want to get your knuckles bloody. That’s no way to live.

“You need to move on and if that means distance between us, then I guess I will just have to accept that. But I want you to be happy; I want you to love someone who can love you back in the same way.” 

Genma felt the stinging in his eyes, but he refused to let the tears fall. He had already shed so many tears over Iruka. 

The door to the bar opened and closed quietly, footsteps making their way to the two men. 

“Sometimes that person is closer than you think, Genma,” Iruka whispered. He placed a gentle kiss against Genma’s cheek and squeezed his arm before standing up and brushing his pants off. 

Genma didn’t know what to make of that statement, but he heard Iruka say quietly to the person that approached, “Please take care of him. I’ve already hurt him enough,” before Iruka went back inside the bar. 

A hand entered his field of vision. He knew that hand as well as he knew his own or Iruka’s. Looking up, he saw Raidou with a soft smile. 

“Let’s get you home, yeah?” Rai said. “We can watch some trashy tv and eat junk food.” 

Genma smiled at Raidou, his chest a little bit lighter and something akin to hope and affection building in the recently vacated space.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! comments/kudos appreciated. 
> 
> [tumblr](https://stupidbadgers.tumblr.com)


End file.
